Friday, August 31, 2012

dog

So, we're watching my boyfriend's parent's dog while they're out of town again. She is such a good dog. She doesn't destroy things, or jump on people/things, or bark for no reason. It is because she is such a good, good dog and yet I can hardly stand her sometimes that I know I'm a bad, bad person. The clanking of her collar on her metal water bowl, how she follows me from one room to the next with her nails click click clicking on the fake wood floor, the sound of her licking her paws incessantly by my bed in the middle of the night, her drooling on the windowsills as she stares outside, having to clean up doggy doo doos before I mow: these things bother me, they accumulate, they make me ready to boot this adorable, well mannered, and gentle animal out the door after a few days.

I can't say that I'm not a dog person. I grew up with dogs. I had one particular dog when I was 10 to 22 that I considered a childhood friend.

Maybe living on my own for five years had messed me up and I don't play well with others anymore. Maybe I loathe the thought of having something completely dependent on me. Maybe there's something to that since having pets and babies have never been appealing to me. They are both very much in the "completely dependent" category.

In conclusion, I am a selfish asshole.

I tried to take a picture of her looking cute and cuddly, but she just ended up looking proud and majestic. She's an extremely photogenic dog apparently.




Wednesday, August 29, 2012

before and after

This fall it will be five years since I bought my house. And I just happened to rediscover some old photos I had taken on my camera. So, to commemorate the occasion I would like to do a little "before and after" photo extravaganza. I'm a sucker for before and after photos. First off, the kitchen. Oh, Hi, kitchen. Here it is a few moths after moving in:
Now:
Well, I see the kitchen hasn't changed much over the years. But I thought my kitchen was pretty awesome when I first moved in so I' haven't done much with it. I promise that the rest will be more dramatic. Moving on: the living room!
Oh, my. What a sad, empty room. No offense, living room. This was all hand me down furniture except the T.V. and stand. I was very happy when I got to throw away that coffee table. So very happy. That thing was in my parent's living room since the 80's and I didn't even like it then. It took me until last year to replace the couch. It was really comfortable and didn't look bad so I had a hard time convincing myself that I should get a new one. But then I saw the new couches they have with those lay down chaise things (perfect for watching T.V./napping multitasking) and I was sold. So here it is now:
Yay! Now, the dining room:
Not bad. Just very bare. When I moved into my house I had saved up a bit of money by living with my parents for a year and a half. So in addition to my down payment, I had enough for a new dining room table, bedroom set, fridge, and oven. And that was it. The rest of the house was hand me down stuff or nothing at all. All of the things I have now is due to a slow steady accumulation over time. I would make one large purchase a year, like a couch or desk or a coffee table. The house was so barren that when I had my new fridge delivered after I moved in, the delivery guy asked when I was expecting the rest of my stuff to get here. Yeah. This is all my stuff, Sir. Anyway, one of the last things I did was put pictures on the wall. Pictures are expensive, yo. Nice looking ones, anyway. I did find some cheap generic looking ones at home discount stores like T.J. Maxx and Hobby Lobby. So for a while I just bought those until I could afford something a little nicer. But that day never seemed to come, so last year I got tired of it and I ripped out the generic pictures and put in over sized calendar prints I liked. They look like a hot mess if you look at the back side of them, but they look nice hanging up.
See. Every picture in my dining room now is actually a calendar print. These two above my couch are my favorites.
Okay, on to the backyard.
I have to say that my "now" backyard photo benefits a lot just from being taken in the summer versus the fall when everything is dead. Although we are talking about summer in Texas here. Everything almost looked like the fall photo until we go some rain a few weeks ago.
Not too much of a difference here except a bit of landscaping and a new shed. Here's the side of the house. The main reason that I almost didn't buy my house five years ago is because it doesn't face the main road, but an alley way. Thus, there's no "backyard" just a "sideyard". It was weird. It still is weird, but I've gotten used to it.
Again, not much of a difference. Just a few new things planted. And a newer Mustang, too.
You probably can't tell from this picture but that quaint little white picket fence around my house is a piece.of.shit. I plan to rip it out next year and I will laugh as I sledgehammer it to bits and drive it to the garbage dump. If you really look at it close, it looks like it was made from whatever bits of scrap wood the contractor had lying around. And the posts holding it up are about five inches in the ground. It's a wobbly, cracking, splitting, crooked mess. I'll move on now. I'm not really a gardener. At all. I don't want to weed and water and all that jazz. I do want the yard to look nice though. The house didn't have any landscaping when I bought it except for a few bushes by the front door, so over the years I've planted a few things that are drought resistant (I live in Texas, remember) and flower at some point. Nothing major. Literally one or two things every year. This next photo is of the side of the house when I first moved in. I'm only posting it because I want you to see what a big difference four years makes (I had lived here a year before I bought these) when you plant a happy native Texas plant.
BAM!
Besides for the few months after I planted them, I have never watered these guys. Never fertilized them. They are a lazy gardener's dream. Okay. Well, that was fun, right? Maybe?

Monday, August 27, 2012

hash slinging slasher

I know this is an incredible coincidence but, not even five minutes after watching an episode of Paranormal Witness on syfy.com last night, my house became haunted. This happens every time I watch that show, but I never seem to learn my lesson.

Saturday, August 25, 2012

30!

It was my 30th birthday last Thursday. I feel like I should do something to dissect the past three decades of my life. You know: what I've accomplished and places I've been and cool things I've done. I feel like those kind of lists become a bit of a comparison between others of the same age so you can see who's life has been "better" so far.

I feel like the most important thing I can say at 30 is that my life has continually improved since I've gotten out of high school. Every year I've felt more freedom and more comfortable in my own skin and thus greater happiness. I'm not saying that I'm completely confident in my decisions or abilities all of the time, but I'm making slow steady progress to understanding and trusting myself more.

There is more responsibility that comes with age, but when it means that you are also in charge of the direction of you life and the conditions you live in, it's a very easy kind of trade off. I think this idea of responsibility is what scared me so much about getting older when I was in middle and high school. Would I be able to be a functional adult? Could I take care of myself? Could I not fuck up my entire life? Well, yes. There are mistakes to be made, but it's what makes life such a journey and worth experiencing. There are lows and highs and in betweens and they all have their own kind of lessons and magic to them.

Sunday, August 19, 2012

shakedown project

This music is making me very happy. I hope they put out a full length album in the near future. I also hope they become rich and famous, but not so rich and famous that it's not fun anymore.


Friday, August 10, 2012

d.c.

We drove 1,300 miles to Washington, D.C. and after three days of walking around the national mall and visiting six Smithsonian museums, this is as close to the White House as our poor aching feet wanted to go.